Each year goes by and we either make a new resolution to change what we know or resign ourselves to repeat the past. As we age, we hope to learn what feels right to us but what if our perception of right changes as we get older.
We all know that love is complicated at any age but beyond the mis-communications and co-dependencies, does love change with age? At 22, 44, or 65 we have had different life experiences and if we evolve in our careers, our travels, and friendships, it seems very likely and almost natural that our relationship wants would change over time as well. Nicholas Bakalar of the NY times tells us “Happiness May Come with Age” according to a recent survey in NYTimes Health.
Perhaps you are 22 and have just graduated college and are wondering how entering a demanding profession with a 50 hour work week might impact your relationship? Maybe this week marks the anniversary of your divorce and you are now considering entering the dating world. What will this relationship be like this time? Maybe you are 65 recently retired and about to embark on the next chapter in your life. How will you and your spouse be together when the work day no longer dictates your schedule?
There is no gender gap with love, at any age we may seek it out but once we find it, we don’t always know how to handle love. It is complicated because some of us treat love as a verb, something we demonstrate to others on how much we need them or want them. Others treat love as a noun, it is something that is always there and because it is so familiar, like friendship, it can be easily taken for granted without realizing it.
As life happens people relate to love differently. When you are happy you don’t have to remain static about love and you can move into a positive place. Meaning the place where you make decisions based on reason and not guilt. At any age you can decide to let your guard down and be open to compromise without reproach. Love is complicated because sometimes it leads to uncertainty and at any age we all have are own insecurities. The good news is that with age we get comfortable in our own skin and we can change our perception and choose not to be complacent with love.