Alright, so in every culture there are those things you can’t avoid. For example if your in Boston you will always run into the “hey-how-ya-doing” guy selling sausages. It’s inevitable. So what is common on Phish tour?
1. That guy who is so pumped that he’s high fiving EVERYBODY. Lets be honest, we have ALL been that guy at one point or another at a show. Phish will do that to you.
2. Hot chicks carrying hula-hoops with them anyplace they go.
3. The guy with the “Free hugs” sign. It’s always funny, the first time.
4. That kid who looks like Jesus.
5. The guy dressed as a banana.
6. The bros that are too drunk and heckle the hot chicks with hoola-hoops.
7. The old hippie guy who had been on tour too long.
8. The 16 year old noob trying to score beer.
9. The cactus guy.
10. Beautiful dreads on beautiful heads.
11. The cute girl dressed like a nymph selling vegan delights.
12. The spunion that took too much and NEEDS a water.
13. People selling Jello shots as a family business.
14. Phamily and Family.
15. The drunk girl who drank all that Moonshine.
16. “Reys”: fans that look way too much like Trey.
17. Heads selling headie prints.
18. The jerk security guard who’s taking everyone’s party favors for himself.
19. The hot girl who wants a miracle… and will do anything for it.
20. The wannabe shaman selling burritos.
21. The guy next to a 80 pound tank with a balloon hanging out of his mouth…Three for 20! No deals!
22. The couples who have an extra friendly Pitt Bull that will smother you with kisses.
23. The guy who’s only on tour to hitch a ride to the festival this weekend.
24. The guy with kind.
25. Cute girl with bunk.
26. The chill dead head walking around playing ‘Chinacat Sunflower’ on his guitar.
27. The baby with head phones on./The toddler at his/her 40th Phish show…or the parent at his/her 400th.
28. The girl with flowers in her hair with a guy with a crazy hat.
29. The phan who got off tour, got a real job and threw on tie dye for the first time in years.
30. Dready Feddys.
31. Green Man.
32. The Sloth.
Hope you enjoyed that!…Who are you?
Wait… two more… The girls with bright colored wigs and the kid passing out flyers for festivals.